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Quotable: Gender Discriminatory Language

In honor of International Women’s Day, I want to make a few call outs here. Those who know me, know I’m big on equality and feminist AF. I wanted to share a few quotes that have happened to me as a woman in the technology industry that I have overcome and have changed the way I think of being a female not just in technology, but in the world.

Notable quotes:

Body Comments:

Male Co-worker: “Where do you want to go for lunch?”

Me: “I don’t care.”

Male Co-worker: “Well, if you had cared about where you went to lunch in the past, maybe you wouldn’t be in the gym so much now.”

Emotional Comments:

Me: “You disrespected me and what I asked you to do in front of a lot of people.”

Male co-worker: “I’m sorry I made you upset.”

Rude Jokes

Me: “Here are some stickers that you can put on your computers to support our transformation!”

Male co-worker: “I don’t put stickers on my computer.”

Me: “Well then you can feel free to stick it somewhere else.” (completely calm and matter of fact demeanor, instructing them to put a sticker on their desk or water bottle etc.)

Male co-workers: “Ohhh!!!!”

Unwanted Advances:

After drinking at a conference and sharing an elevator ride, male forces himself at me and starts to kiss me. I say “NO! STOP!” and push him off of me. He comes back, twice, and I physically have to shove him to make him stop.


While trying to negotiate a well-deserved raise for doing a great job, taking on more responsibilities, and earning recognition.

Male boss: “No, you should be grateful you have this job in the first place.”

Intelligence/Experience Questioning:

“Clearly you have no real-world experience.” (over 6 years and 4 companies into my career)

“Do you even know what code looks like?” (I started my career as a developer)

Age discrimination:

“You’re too young and pretty to have done all the things you say you’ve done.”

Plain Misogyny:

Male interviewer: “You know, I think it’s women’s fault that they aren’t in higher ranks in companies. There are already a lot of men up there. Those men are likely married to women who are with them for their money and therefore are insecure and jealous and unintelligent. Those wives wouldn’t want their husbands hiring and working closely with younger, more attractive women. It’s those wives fault that women aren’t getting leadership positions because women are jealous. I’m lucky my wife isn’t jealous.”

And women aren’t immune:

Female co-worker: “You should dress down more like everyone else here. It kind of makes you look like a bitch.”

I could go on. Discrimination is alive and well. If you don’t believe it, open your eyes, ears, and heart. If you think women and men are equal now you are wrong. If you think they shouldn’t be, you are wrong. Stand together, fight back, and take what is yours. Let me know how I can support you and let’s be each other’s voices!

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